When I started this disease cruise Im on, (that sounds less cliche than cancer journey and maybe even a little more exciting…ok…maybe not) I eventually thought I would write a lot about the things I was going through. Goodness knows I had a lot to say and I had a lot of thoughts constantly going through my head at a fast pace. However, even in the middle of one of the most revelatory seasons of my life, much of what I had to say was to be held in and mulled over. I heard the prophet Jennifer Eivaz say that A prophet comes out of the cave mouth first (please forgive my lack of quotations around a quote, as my quotation button is stuck and Im beginning to believe its also a part of Gods doing in breaking down my perfectionistic character…but it still drives me CRAZY!) and I am just now at the place where I am preparing to come out of the cave I have been in this past year. Who knows what will happen when I do.
My thoughts are so random and so many and it is hard to keep them all in order sometimes. I remember one time my Mom said about her own Dad (who I loved more than anything in this world) that she realized that for his whole life his mind was never at rest. It was constantly going and he was in a perpetual state of exhaustion that would leave him angry and later in his life a little deluded. For some reason her words about him have stuck with me for a long time and during my disease cruise I thought about them a lot as God has revealed so many things to me about a spiritual heritage that has been passed down through this lineage. I think a lot of people have this same issue with too many thoughts at too fast a pace to process so they all seem to pile up in your head. I have learned that what we do with that can depend on what we call that back up of info. Most of us call it anxiety because…well….because it makes us anxious when we cant sort things out in our head and we begin to over think everything. I am learning that the secret in my dealing with this is to mature spiritually enough to discern which thoughts bare contemplation and which thoughts need to be drop kicked out of my brain.
If you are struggling with anxiety right now, I urge you to sit somewhere quiet, get out your bible, and start to read out loud the book of Psalms. Maybe start at chapter 50 and read on. This is an area of the Psalms where David is crying out to God as he struggles with depression, anxiety, and being pursued by evil and evil men. Read it out loud to God. Often times when I am dealing with spirits of anxiety, depression, or fear it seems like my mouth is shut and I dont know what to say-even to God. Its hard to pray when you are sad. What a gift King David has left us-the words of a frightened and broken man who was living with at times the consequences of his own actions but also the actions of others who wanted to destroy him.
You might not have an earthly, tangible enemy who is looking to destroy your life, but we all have one in the supernatural realm who is looking on the earth to see who he can steal from, destroy, and kill. If you are dealing with mental health, please realize your being stalked by your enemy and it is imperative you fight for your place in the Kingdom. Mental illness has always been an issue, but every day we see the news where there is no other explanation than demonic spirits being unleashed on the people of the earth. It is all around us. I will be in specific prayer today for those of you who happen to read this and are struggling. If you want to, shoot me a message and we can talk so I can pray for you more specifically. You have been bought with the greatest price one can give-their own life. This means you are loved and cherished in the heavenly realm, even if you dont feel it in the earthly one.
Life Beyond the Noise 